Monday, 30 January 2012


Sinking ship

Top bike crashes


Who will take the second shot in this snooker game? 

Find out after the break.

so true

Just seen the headline: Women are better parkers than men.

That's nosey parkers, right?


What do you get if you cross a primary school playground with a bag of sweets?



Nobody likes surveys.

I don't know how I know that.

Sinking ship

What's the fastest way to get off an Italian cruise ship? 

Follow the Captain.

music joke

If we all end up going to jail for downloading music, I at least hope they separate us by music genre.

Saturday, 28 January 2012

Top Line

I went to the hospital today for swallowing too much concrete dust...

I almost shit a brick


a man goes into a pub orders his drink and spots two nice looking women sat at a table chatting. he says to the barman"i think il try my luck with those two tonight dave" the barman replied"you've got no chance mate their both lesbians". so he pick his beer up walked over to the table sat himself down and said"so what part of lesbania do you two come from then".     

Very funny

Dog tease

This is fast becoming one of the must have free apps View Ads on Phone and get paid !!!

great video

Funny take a look

good line

As a suicidal maniac I like to live life on the edge

gives you a smile

I was talking to this holocaust surviver, she was really interesting and I wanted to know more.

So I asked her for her number.     


My mum was part of a gang and was always in trouble with the law. Some nights she'd come home from a "job" - she's black, it's not a real one, don't worry - and she'd just start swearing at me. But even as she called me a piece of shit or told me to fuck off, one thing she never really understood was the irony of calling me a son of a bitch.

Shame really, because she's actually the mum of a snitch and is now serving 8 years


I was once asked if I had any African in me. Being white I replied "no of course not" it was then I was gang raped in the prison showers. I like this! This is poor. Edit this

sounds like it would happern to

This really fit blonde from work asked me if i was doing anything at lunch. I said no and she wanted to come have lunch with me. During lunch I admitted i had a crush on her from the beginning.

She admitted she had forgot her purse at home and was starving.     

good laugh

I was looking up my family tree the other day and found myself thinking, "I really should buy these poor buggers a house." I like this! This is poor. Edit this

Friday, 27 January 2012


What's easier to pick up the heavier it gets?Women

Great quote

"Sir, could you please step out of the vehicle?""I'm too drunk, you get in."

top joke

A fireman runs into a classroom holding a screwdriver and shouts out 'THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!!'


I don't think I'll ever get over my wife dying.She's blocking the doorway and I'm confined to a wheelchair.


I've filmed a lot of big movies over the years.Been kicked out of plenty of cinemas for it too.


To stop myself from coming to soon when having sex with my wife I just think of her